Seeing Me

When I look in the mirror do I like what I see

Perhaps I like my reflection,but do I see me

Do I see the woman that always tries

Yet if I look closer still, do my eyes reflect my silent cries

Is there strength and courage forming on the line around my nose

When people ask for a good woman, the point at me saying,”There she goes.”

Do I see all my faults and none of my beauty

Or will my eyes only see me, seeing me

Can having acne impact your life? But I think I can help.

Quick answer for me, YES! I don’t know that people who have never suffered from constant breakout understand that.

I started having massive breakouts when I was eleven years old. It was really bad. It was so bad I was once asked did I have chicken pox. That was quiet humiliating. I hated going anywhere. I hated talking to people. I often heard people talking about me behind my back, some would be so bold to tell me to my face. “Hey girl you ugly,” “Don’t nobody want you with all them thangs on yo face,” and “Hey ugly,” Sometimes I would get the “why don’t you look like your sister,” as if I had a choice.When I would go and apply for jobs, I was always placed in the back if I was hired.

I know some of you can relate. Acne can be a B*^*h. But here is what I learned about me and acne. When I was stationed in Kuwait they do not drink cows’s milk, which I happen to drink a lot of when I was growing up. Instead I drank a lot of tea, and because I still liked cereal I actually put water(which I do not recommend) on my cereal. My skin slowly started to clear up soon it was beautiful. And for the first time in my life i got a compliment. Yeah you heard me, a compliment. I had never had one, only insults.

Later on I learned of black African soap and shea butter, both of which has held me tremendously with my skin.

So below are the things I use to help treat my acne

Very low amounts of cows’s milk, (I think this is because of all the hormones )

Retin-A which I sometimes use but not often

Shea butter

Black African Soap

I also notice I tend to have more small breakouts if I eat a lot of pizza.

I hope this helps someone. There is nothing good about acne.

Thanks for reading my blog, like, subscribe, comment. Did you suffer from acne?

One other thing.My poem “The show she puts on ,” is how I felt walking around with acne.

The show she puts on

She walks with

her head held high

She ignores the smirks

and sneers of the passerby

She hears the whispers

spoken behind her back

She knows her imperfections

and the beauty she lacks

She feels the laughter

and know there is nothing she can do

Yet she walks head high

to put on a show for you

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My letter to Khloe Kardashian and other,other sisters

You will probably never read this and that is okay. I think I write this more for myself and for the other sisters of the world. You will only understand this if you are the other sister. The other sister is the one nobody pays attention to or is often compared too. She is the sister that people don’t care how she feels, and she is often overlooked are talked about right to her face.

You don’t know this if you are not the other sister, yet the ones that do they understand. Perhaps I am projecting my feeling about life on Khloe or the other sisters of the world. I know how I was treated and sometimes I am still treated like that even now.

My younger sister complained that Khloe had so much work done to her face, and she wondered why did she have to do so much plastic surgery. I responded. ” You’ve never had someone walk up to you and tell you that your sister is pretty, what happen to you?” My sister seem to be shocked when I told her of the people that often reminded me that my face was broken out are that I was not pretty. Hell I’ve had people flat out tell me that I was ugly and they would not care how I reacted.

And Kloe if your are anything like me or some of the other sisters you find yourself in relationships becasue finally someone like you and did not secretly like your sister. You did not care that it was a bad relationship it was just that somebody finally like you. And you overlooked every red flag to hold on to that feeling of being picked first.

Its sad and I know, but if you have never been on the receiving end of the meanness that the other sister goes through you will never understand. Because those moments when you feel beautiful are few and you want to hold on to them because you know that people will treat you nice otherwise you are invisible or talked about in the most crude way possible. People say that beauty is not important, but those are people who have never been treated in a crude way are compared to the next person only to be ignored or laughed at. I think all women want to be pretty or beautiful if for no other reason so that people want be so cruel to you.

Kloe what ever you need to do to feel pretty, do it. And for all the other sisters out there, do what makes you feel beautiful. I know they tell you that beauty is what is on the inside, but most people do not wait around to get to know the inside becasue they are to busy being crude to your outer appearance. And I have seen plenty of pretty mean girls, they never seem to have problems getting any friends no matter how they treat them.

Well I said what I needed to say.

Like, subscribe, comment, Thanks for reading, And for you other sisters I understand how you feel. You are not alone in this world.

Week 1 Challenge: Complement someone

I know ,I know we all have the typical weight loss goal and/or save more money. How is that working for you? I mean don’t give up on those goals just don’t go about them the way you have in the past.(hint ,It did not work for me) And I know our lives should not be based on other people’s opinion but  sometimes it is. And there is something good about a complete stranger complementing you on something you might be self conscious of and watch how they may walk with a little more pep in their step. I mean don’t tell everyone around you the same thing because no one will feel special.And the goal of this challenge is to lift someone spirits. Trust me this will make you  both feel good.

Happy New Years everyone.

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Agree To It And See What Happens

So I have this friend (not me) that people like to call gay. Not that anything is wrong with it. As far as I know he is not gay.Again not that anything is wrong with it. Anyways in order to cut an argument short about his sexuality  if someone accuses him of being gay his response is, “Perhaps”.  This stops an argument dead in its tracks. If you are a certain way, gay, racist, fat,skinny, pretty ,ugly, wrong, right, etc. What happens if you admit to it.

Think about it. If people call you a racist what happens if you respond with “perhaps?” If it is a problem you are working on admitting  may help you get out of that crux in your life.

Make no mistake I have seen this work for me as well, no not being a racist or gay,not that anything is wrong with it (the gay part that is), but with other things in life.Prime example my mom  snores when she sleeps. I means she is so loud my daughter once thought we had a wild animal in the house. She has even woken herself from her loud snoring complaining that she kept hearing strange noises. Yet when we pointed out to her that she was the one making the strange loud noises it turned into a 30 disagreement on why it could not be her and that surly the noise she heard was coming from the loud t.v.  Later I feel asleep on the same couch and when awoke my mom then accused me of snoring. My reply, “That sounds about right I was tired I  must snore when I am sleep so I want argue with you because I am not sure what I do in my sleep becasue I am sleep.” She was not happy with this response. But oh well I was in no mood to argue about what I did when I was sleep, because I was sleep. And what harm would it have caused me for her to be right about me snoring in my sleep.

Ok people I want you to agree  with someone, try it for a week,a day, or with just some random stranger and let me know how it went.

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Treat it like an addiction (Pre-New Years workout)

30 Day Walking Exercise

I must admit, I do not smoke, drink, nor do I do any type of drug but I have been around people who do or have done all of the above. And the one thing I notice about these people is complete dedication  to there addiction. Make no mistake I know that no one wants to be addicted to drugs or alcohol and some of you who read this may become angry at what I say. So in advance I will say that I am sorry and I do not mean to offend anyone. This is only my observation. I notice that people that smoke find every opportunity they can to smoke.

Examples :  After parking the car and walking en route to where ever. They smoke. Before leaving the house, they smoke. Before going or coming anywhere ,they smoke. If they can’t smoke in the house they will stand outside in the rain, snow, extreme heat, extreme cold, you name a smoker will do what ever it takes to get that cigarette.

I used tis pin because the main character tends to have this habit but will stop doing it to hold peoples privacy

Suppose you had that same enthusiasm  to get in shape, to loose weight, to look beautiful, to__________________________(fill in the blank) like a person with an addiction. It has to start somewhere. Last week I ask you to start drinking more water. Drink it when you first wake up, before you eat, after you eat,  before you go to bed. If you are doing this you should already see a difference in your skin and feel it your body.

This week start moving. Walk, ride a bike, run, do something everyday for 10 minutes. And when you are finish drink water. Drink lots of water cause you deserve it. Treat your health like an addiction.

Good luck everyone trying to be better.  Tell me what you do to get healthy

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