It starts with weed.

I’m sure many of us have heard the saying, ” weed, marijuana is a gateway drug. ” Of course I did not believe that,now I’m starting to wonder. Perhaps that saying is true. Hear me out before you disagree with me on this far out theory that I’m about to spit out.

Okay, so as I said before marijuana is believed to be a gateway drug,because people believe that once you start smoking weed it makes it easier to try harder and harder drug. You know drugs like meth,heroine,cocaine, oxycodone,etc, you get the idea. Once you see people smoking weed all the time you become use to it. At some point it is not even a big deal. Next thing you know it will become legal and all the state’s will be making billions from tax revenues.

I’m sure no one thought that would truly ever happen,but it did. Now again bare with me here. Ok so over say maybe 20 years ago the Osbournes where the first family to have a reality show. Next thing you know regular tv shows like CSI and Rikki Lake are canceled for a reality show. We are getting so hooked on reality tv we now vote for a president because we see him everyday. No one saw that coming either.

Everything was slow and subtle,we didn’t see it coming. For this reason we should be aware of what we are excepting. Because over time thing a will change of we are not aware. This could be good or bad. Look at your life now. Can you pinpoint the exact moment when everything changed?

I know I may be a little out there. But sometimes my mind will do that.

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Does society value women?

I will probably make a lot of people mad and you know what I don’t care. I need to tell my truth. I was once in the military and while I was serving I was injured. It was a hip injury. While I sustained other injuries while in the military this one would come back and haunt me.

I’ve mentioned in past blogs how I was sometimes treated as a female in the military always having to prove I belonged there. It is really a small difference working in the civilian world. Society does not tell you, that they hate for a woman to become pregnant if she works. They don’t tell you, how a woman will wait to the very last minute to tell her employer that she is pregnant because she knows there is a strong chance she might not get the raise,or the promotion, or perhaps even get hired.

What they tell you is,you must have this baby. Because in societies mind only promiscuous women get pregnant and need an abortion. That is far from the truth. As I mentioned before I was once in the military (security forces) and I sustained a hip injury. Fast forward 10 years and for the first time ever I am pregnant. I am excited. But that excitement did not last. Despite having a degree and military experience I could not find a great job, but I did have a job as a cashier at a warehouse.

We were required to lift heavy bulky items, there were no exceptions if you where pregnant. The problems first started when I was about 3 months pregnant and my body started really changing to accommodate the baby. The change created so much pain in my hip I could not stand longer than 10 minutes at a time. I was forced on bed rest for the remainder of my pregnancy. My hospital filed the wrong codes therefore the insurance company did not want to pay the hospital. This in turn made my Dr not want to fill out my paperwork so I could get short term disability at work.

This went on for about 4 months. I was spending all my savings. I’m stressing out which I don’t need to do because I am already high risk pregnancy . Even after explaining what happened it took another month to finally “fix” the error. I never wanted to go through that again. Once my baby came I immediately had a tubal ligation which failed 3 years later. And no my insurance company did not want to cover the pregnancy because they were aware that I had had a tubal ligation and they thought this was some form of insurance fraud. Yes I did have that baby. I was placed on bed rest with her as well. And yes if you are wondering I do love my little girl. The point of my story is this. All forms of birth control does not work. I had to jump through hoops when it came to my insurance when it came to me getting a tubal ligation. You see it is considered an elective surgery. I did not know that at the time.

I still do not work now. My hip did not go back to the way it was. If I sit the wrong way, lay the wrong way, stand up to long, I will not be able to walk for a while and if I do the pain is unbearable. But that is neither here nor there. The point of my story is for those people that like to look down on women who accidentally get pregnant. I’m just here to say, It can happen. That does not mean she is promiscuous. And that society treats pregnant women different and not in a good way.

One other quick thing. Most women know of a man that was promoted despite him deserving it simply because he is a man. Its funny how if a man’s wife haves a baby he ask for a raise to take care of his family. He is often given this raise to take care of his family. While on the other hand a women is overlooked, and underpaid because she is now a mother.

Ok I am through with my rambling.

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The show she puts on

She walks with

her head held high

She ignores the smirks

and sneers of the passerby

She hears the whispers

spoken behind her back

She knows her imperfections

and the beauty she lacks

She feels the laughter

and know there is nothing she can do

Yet she walks head high

to put on a show for you

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Can you love someones’ music and not like them

I will start this blog off saying “Sorry mom, I know you love R. Kelly.” And I love my mom. I think if my mom did a lot of horrible things I would still love her, becasue she is my mom. Glad she has never done many horrible things to put my love to the test. But R. Kelly has.

In high school I remember listening to R. Kelly music. Later as I started a career in the Air Force I would dance to his music at the NCO clubs and perhaps any party that I attended. R. Kelly has awesome music. That does not mean he is a great person. My mom can not seem to differentiate between the two. In her mind everyone else is lying on R.Kelly. Despite me pointing out that “Just becasue you make good music does not mean you are a good person.” I explain that that the two are not mutual exclusive she does not care.

I watched that interview with Gail King. She did an awesome job. I also watched R.Kelly get so emotional he was borderline psycho. If you have ever been in an abusive relationship you know this is where it starts. The pounding of the fist to get a point across, the out of control sobbing, the “I’m the victim,” look. He wanted you to feel sorry for him. And in his mind he probably thinks he has done nothing wrong. Or if he did they deserved it, or it is not as bad as everybody is saying it is. Yet he showed you who he is right there.

Now to play devil’s advocate. If people are aware of the things that R.Kelly did and do not want the radio to play is music. How is that any different than acknowledging his sins and not acknowledging how wrong displaying confederate statutes anywhere is. The soldiers of the confederate where not patriots. They fought against what is right. We know that slavery was wrong. Just like we know what R. Kelly did was and is wrong. I know some of you are thinking that’s as different as apples and oranges. Is it though.

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